Note To Self: I Love You!

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You’ve heard it all before; “you only get what you put in” or “you're giving off the wrong vibe” or “just ask the universe for what you desire”. I for one can vouch for, and fervently do believe in the law of attraction. 

So how can this help you to find love? 

Speaking from personal experience, I had to learn to love myself when my marriage of almost a quarter of a century abruptly ended. This was the jolt I needed to get in touch with my true self again, something that is not exclusive to sages and mystics. 

My work as a personal stylist acted as my crutch, my support in my post-marriage days. Through my work I related to others with shared experiences of life and love. Relating to others in this way made me re-evaluate myself, my hopes, my fears and my innermost desires. I began to see what it was that I would expect from a relationship – as well as what I didn’t want. 

I began to realise that when you exude confidence, others will believe in you too, they will gravitate towards you. You can have your own unique style and approach to love and life in general, in so doing you are being true to yourself. And it is then others will get to know you, the real you. 

In a relationship you will expect certain things from a suitor – as they will expect things from you. How will you know whether or not you can fulfil their wants and needs if you don’t even know your own self? 

Coffee provides a safe way to find that special someone, taking away the need for endless swiping of screens and searching into the wee hours. Whilst Coffee is the catalyst for love, you have to be ready to receive the gifts. A doctor’s appointment is an analogy I like to use; I can take you there on time and even come into the surgery with you. However, only you can say what your symptoms are and ultimately it is you who must act upon the doctor’s advice. 

My tips for being open to love are: 
  1. 1. Know what it is what you want from a relationship and what it is you are prepared to give e.g. do you want children? Would you be willing to relocate? 
  1. 2. Be prepared to compromise – no one and nothing is ever perfect, just as you yourself are not! 
  1. 3. Be yourself; when you meet in person there are no “filters” you can apply. 

This is by no means and exhaustive list, though it’s a start. 

So, if you’re ready for love, perhaps start with taking heed of the great philosopher Socrates, who once said something that still holds true to this day: know thyself. 

Deb X 
Sophia Johnson30/05/2021 22:56